In this video, I will show you how to improve your sentences by removing the word “you”.
Using the word “you” is usually a “no-no” with professors because it addresses the reader directly.
But there’s another problem with this word as I’m going to show you right now. Let’s take a look at an example.
“You have to be able to have some feedback from a consumer.”
This a sentence is from a real student essay. And here’s another problem with it.
“You” in this sentence is the subject.
However, there’s a real subject in the sentence.
So, here’s what we’re going to do.
Step 1. Find the real subject.
In this sentence, the real subject is not “you.”
The real subject is “feedback from a consumer.”
Because that’s what the sentence is really about – it’s about feedback from the consumer, not about “you.”
Step 2. Put the real subject up front.
We’ll just take “feedback from a consumer” and place it in the beginning of the sentence. Okay?
I really want you to learn how to begin your sentences with the real subject.
And this is what we have now:
“Feedback from a consumer, you have to be able to have some.”
Okay, it’s a funny-sounding sentence, but we’re not done yet. Right?
Step 3. Delete the word “you.”
Now let’s just do it.
And here’s what we have:
“Feedback from a consumer have to be able to have some.”
Okay it’s still a funny-sounding sentence but we’re not done yet.
Step 4. Find a better way to say it.
So what is the writer really trying to say?
The writer is really trying to say that feedback from a consumer really must be had. It just must be had; we must have it.
So what is a better way in English to say it; to say the same thing?
Well, how about:
“Feedback from the consumer is necessary.”
How about that?
Okay, it’s just a much shorter sentence but notice how much more elegant it is, and it’s just better English.
So let’s compare our sentences now.
Original: “You have to be able to have some feedback from a consumer.”
And here’s what we did: “Feedback from a consumer is necessary.”
We have removed the word “you.” We started the sentence with the subject and, as result, we have a much better sentence.
Now you can say,
“Tutor Phil, in my original sentence, I had 12 words. And the way you’re teaching me to do it, now I have 6 words. But I need words because my professor wants 1,000 words in this essay and, if I keep doing what you’re teaching me, I’m going to keep coming up with half of the content.”
Okay, but trust me – this is just a poor way to add words. Don’t add words this way.
Instead, I will teach you a much better way to add words.
Click here and download the report that I prepared in which you will learn how to add 300 words to any essay in 15 minutes.
And you can actually repeat the process to add more words, but these are quality words and you’re going to add them without using the word “you,” or being repetitious.
Don’t use bad ways to add words. There’s a great way to add words, and I’m going to teach it to you for free. Just go here and download this report.
See you there!